PUA on May 9

Unfortunately, I wasn't able to retrieve my old blog. So I have created a new one.

Here are some thoughts I need to take note of.

Last week, I had a date with the same girl on the Friday and Saturday. When I went out that Friday night, I felt like all emotional and sexual neediness was gone. Since I wasn't used to that, I wondered whether it was a good or bad thing since at the same time I felt no desire for any woman. I seemed to realize that MOST women cannot fulfill both my emotional and sexual needs and sometimes not even either. Knowing that, I felt like I wasn't missing out on anything.

Last night, I had my second date with another girl. What I realized was not any different but rather reinforced. Once again, I came out with very little neediness. But more importantly, I realized that I felt NO desire to escalate if she wasn't a turn-on for me either sexually or if I'm not falling for her emotionally.

A bit later, I also came to the conclusion that if I am not attracted to the girl during our first date, there is NO point pursuing her or dating her again. As a result, I have decided two things.

1) The girl I see will have only ONE chance to prove herself attractive enough in terms of her personality.
2) If I find the girl physically attractive, I will escalate as much as possible during the first encounter. This means I will give them a hug right away like I used to and hold their hand right away as we enter the Cafe or activity location. I will hold her hand only briefly the first time. If she rejects my move, I won't take it personally. I will make another attempt later.
3) After the first date, I will decide if I want to see her again depending on whether I am already attracted to her.

The Art of the Pickup DVD says that too often men and women end up together because it is forced. In other words, the man picks a woman without knowing at all whether she is a good fit. I fully agree. Consequently, I need to become more picky and display it in my choices and behaviors.

- - -

There is another key thing I realized last night and I noticed that recently. When I went out last night, I had the following negative thoughts:

"It is a waste of time" "Why am I doing this?" "Why isn't it easy for me like it seems for those guys?" "I don't like it that even if she seems to give me good signs, they often reject my approach. It is confusing and frustrating." "How many times do I need to try to make it work?"
"I should just focus on Day Game."

Those kind of thoughts are not new but last night was different because I felt those thoughts were not as Loud, did not resonate with me as much... as if they were there but I felt little emotions from it. This is a good thing. The bad thing of course is that it was still affecting my behavior in a negative way.